Flagging in the polls, even after Trump’s no-show at the most recent Republican debate, Ted Cruz returned to the old reliable standard of bashing gay people to try and garner more support from Iowa’s religious extremist voter block.
In an effort to make even more of a sideshow of himself, Ted called in the bearded homophobe Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty infamy. Robertson drew upon his life experience of fooling ducks into thinking he wants to mate with them, before shooting them dead, to offer up some REAL policy to help America. Launching into a tirade where he protested just a little too much to not raise suspicion, he explained how the only real issue America faces is gay people getting married:
When a fellow like me looks at the landscape and sees the depravity, the perversion — redefining marriage and telling us that marriage is not between a man and a woman? Come on Iowa! It is nonsense. It is evil. It’s wicked. It’s sinful. They want us to swallow it, you say. We have to run this bunch out of Washington, D.C. We have to rid the earth of them. Get them out of there. Ted Cruz loves God, he loves James Madison and he’s a strict constitutionalist. You know what Ted Cruz understands. God raises these empires up. It is God who brings them down. Cruz trusts God. Cruz trusts James Madison. That’s why I trust Cruz. You know what Iowa, that trumps Trump.
Ted Cruz expressed his ever-deepening devotion to Robertson when he praised his bigotry and Robertson’s ability to do nothing but obsess over gay people 24/7:
How about Phil Robertson. What an extraordinary human being. I mean listen, God makes every one of us unique, but some are uniquer than others. What a voice Phil has to speak out for the love of Jesus. What a joyful, cheerful, unapologetic voice of truth Phil Robertson is.
Ted thinks that is joyful? There is so much hate in that man that even his beard can’t hide it. Besides, Phil Robertson wouldn’t appreciate ANY marriage nowadays, because women wait sometimes until they are 20 to get hitched.
Watch the video below to find out what Phil Robertson considers it proper for women to get married:
Featured image from Wonkette
Christian is from a small town, surrounded by other small towns, in Pennsylvania. He nearly slipped into the conservative K-hole after high school, but was redeemed by Liberal politics and 8 years of Bush. After spending far too long working for corporate America, he has settled back into life as an unapologetic progressive and general caller-out of conservative fallacy and nonsense.